Pacman meets ovarian cancer

more later...

...I'm very tired and weak...

DNA Testing

A Moment in the Life of Michelle

As my guiding spirit and I address the topic of genetic testing, a wave of calmness bathes not only my body and mind, but my essence as well.

Take a deep breath………..Exhale…………….

We are both exploring the topic of DNA testing, first my spirit with innate knowledge, guidance, and support, and myself as I begin this exploration with strength and curiosity.

The first results of my family history, genealogy DNA test came to me, not by the Texas company that received my cheek sample in early June, but from Derek in Australia via an e-mail yesterday. He wrote that it appeared “we have a 5^th cousin match on chromosome 19 with Family Finder” and would I send him more information on my family genealogy.

How could this be? I asked myself as I began my investigation into not only the reference to the DNA test results, but to Derek’s specific question.

In response to my disbelief, this morning’s second e-mail from Derek included a copy from his results that includes my name. Hopefully, within a few days I will receive official notification about my genealogy DNA as it relates to people and places throughout the world.

The other arm of my DNA testing was revealed three hours ago when I received documentation from my new oncologist that I was BRCA2 positive as determined by a Utah company. That means I’m a carrier of a mutated gene that makes me more vulnerable (at higher risk) for ovarian and breast cancer. Or to put it another way, two of my three diagnosed cancers (ovarian, aka, primary peritoneal and breast) are a result of genes I inherited.

What else does this positive result mean? I will find out in time. But, I know I will be guided in this medical DNA search with my guiding spirit, doctors, and curiosity.

Take a deep breath………..Exhale…………….

NOTE:

This writing was inspired in Writers Workshop this week at The Wellness Community in Santa Monica.

The art was inspired in Art Therapy last week at Premiere Oncology, also in Santa Monica, California. This piece, “A Moment in the Life of Michelle” was modified from, “A Day in the Life of Michelle,” mixed media, July 2010.

Now What?

As an update of the last week or so, the fluid (ascites, a by product of uncontrolled cancer) in my torso has been increasing for at least the past week. Since I experienced this a year ago and ended up with a 4-day hospital stay, I suspected that the chemo I began at the beginning of June was NOT working.

On Monday, July 5, a holiday, I decided I would start my preparation for a CT-PET scan (limited food and drink procedure) on Tuesday, and prepare to show-up at my oncologist's office early Tuesday morning, all in order to get this checked out, without having to be admitted to the hospital.

I was very lucky because someone cancelled her scan and I was scanned by 1pm! !!!!! My oncologist had the report by Wednesday am and I was in his office by 1:10, ten minutes early !!!

Since I have been on five different chemos over the past two years, two of which did not work, he was sending me to Premiere Oncology, a place I go for weekly art therapy sessions. He said there may be some clinical trials that maybe effective.

My oncologist wanted to be notified who my new doctor would be so the two of them could have a discussion about my case and to whom he would fax my records. From the oncologist office I attempted to make an appointment with the best doctor who was doing ovarian cancer clinical trials. The time: 1:30. After 15 minutes of being on hold because the scheduler at Premiere was busy, I was told P..., would call me back. As I was leaving my dear oncologist office, the doctor who has help me to stay alive since 2004, he was faxing my records to the head doctor at Premiere Oncology.

As I drove home, there was NO return call from P... . I have run into that issue of not receiving a call-back in a timely fashion in the past with my GP so, then as well as yesterday, I decided to JUST show up! Did I tell you that Premiere Oncology is ten blocks from my home!

By 5 o'clock, the two doctors had spoken, the 19-page fax of my most important medical history was in the new doctor's hands, my vitals were taken by a nurse I know, and my new doctor, someone I had previously met on several other occasions, had completed the comprehensive, intake examination. The 'Ball is rolling.'

By this Thursday morning I will have an appointment to get the excess fluid withdrawn from my torso ASAP. It feels like there is at least a gallon of fluid filling my torso and pressing on my organs.

p.s. While my new doctor was examining me my phone silently went off at 4:30--I later checked it and it was P... returning my call. "Please call back to make an appointment" (Little did she know, I created my own appointment by being "Patient Active," an important concept from The Wellness Community, an international and local support program for cancer survivors and family.

Image: Detail of a custom made bed spread from Bali

Today in the bank...

Recently, I heard several people say that some cancer patients don’t die from their cancer, but from a secondary illness or disease. Well, I’m doing pretty good these days since my current chemotherapy drug, aka, ‘chemo #3’, is successfully bringing down my tumor marker, the CA-125.

But today in the bank, shortly after they opened, one of their ‘customers’ was wearing a mask and demanding money from the tellers. I suspect that when the tellers weren’t giving him the money fast enough, that's when he needed to say, “4! … 3! … 2! …”

He got the money and left, all while I sat fifteen feet away from him in the bank manager’s office, all while I was wondering who to call on my cell phone, all while I was questioning if I should get under the two office chairs, all while I was planning how I would get behind the manager’s desk, and all while I was wondering if I was doing to be killed by a bullet!

Tonight I rejoice that I’m here to write this blog.